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View Full Version : how do i sell my soul to satan???



james ross collins
04-09-2009, 04:49 AM
how do i sell my soul to satan using witchcraft????

Harlock
04-09-2009, 05:07 AM
why do you want too? do you know what happens when you do? you are his to command, so your life may be filled with physical pleasures but u will never know true happiness, on top of that when you die, you go to him and be forever tormented by him, and someday he will pretty much just devour your soul. trust me its not worth it.

chronazon
04-09-2009, 05:35 AM
the first thing you can do is forget about being a witch. selling your soul would leave you with nothing to work for in witchcraft, so with no goals because all your needs would be met theoretically, you would have nothing to do but enjoy life and wait to go to hell, like all the squares and people whose lives worked out for the better in one way or another. its more a proverb of what happens to the squares methinks

Lokia_Zos
04-09-2009, 05:47 AM
First, you need to somehow magickally generate an artificial soul. Build up your ego, or practice asceticism depending on which direction you want to take for this matter...work on that body of light creation stuff while doing this. Practice something rigid, become rigid, apply yourself to nonexistant things. Lick the dark underbelly of most modern religion, where it all seems to fall flat to our experience of things. Define Yourself. Define Yourself. You do not want to remain fluid.

Sine this thing isn't worth much, just give it to "Old Nick" for free.

The actual contract is a simple thing enough, slaughter some chickens and stand at the crossroads and wait until you attract the cops. Speak to the cops as you would to Satan, and give them this artificial soul.

I actually don't recommend you messing with the cops. But, this post is just a mockery.

Strider
04-09-2009, 06:13 AM
how do i sell my soul to satan using witchcraft????

What makes you think that He would even be interested?

Lady Dunsany
04-09-2009, 09:05 AM
I think you should listen to our members. I also think you are confusing witchcraft with selling your soul and Satan. As Strider says why would he be interested, as there are more pressing problems to be dealt with.

chronazon
04-09-2009, 09:20 AM
Speak to the cops as you would to Satan, and give them this artificial soul.

I actually don't recommend you messing with the cops. But, this post is just a mockery.

I got a citation that wasn't an actual ticket before for following a cop like on purpose. it was so much fun and definitly worth it. cops create the visible barrier (the crystallization fatness of where the veil is thinnest at halloween) that seperates the grim bare base reality of the world and society's status quo from the world of spirit, and the souls of allthat is past (akashic records).
if you do it right, you may in fact change society for the better, and not just by giving the cops something zany to remember.

Vastarien202
04-09-2009, 03:34 PM
I agree, why would Satan be intrested? Furthermore, why are YOU interested in attempting it? I think we need some back-story on this one. What are you really trying to do here? Are you intrested in learning Witchcraft, or another Occult discipline, or did you recently lose faith in the Judeo-Christian ways? We can help you reach a solution to your problem, but you have to tell us more about the issue that led to the question.

Elfwyn
04-09-2009, 04:29 PM
Personally, I like the slaughtered chickens at the crossroads/speak to cops as though they are Satan method. These spiritual emissaries will conduct you to a special place for Initiation. There, people robed in white jackets will give you a sacrament that will imbue you with many powers... OK, they'll give you something but it ain't the Power! :p

Now, all joking aside, what you're talking about has NOTHING to do with Witchcraft. It's a really bad metaphor for people leaving Christianity and making a break for the older religions. The Crossroads are a nexus of sorts. The Gods and Goddesses associated with the Crossroads----WAIT! What am I doing?!? :eek:

Sorry but I'm NOT going to give a serious answer to this at this time. It kind of goes against personal Oaths to discuss the 'Truth' of Mysteries without proper cause. Kind of like 'Don't talk to strangers'.

If you're serious, then talk to us. I will personally give up any information that I can, if you are genuinely seeking. So will many of the very kind people here. I can't speak for them in any way but I'm pretty sure of their kindness.

If you're just Trolling then I've just wasted minutes that I can never get back. And shame on you for it!

Gazeeboh
04-10-2009, 01:37 PM
Do a barrel roll!

Red Serpent
04-10-2009, 02:28 PM
chronazon:
... so with no goals because all your needs would be met theoretically, you would have nothing to do but enjoy life and wait to go to hell...

So Paris Hilton DID sell her soul??? I KNEW IT!


Strider:
What makes you think that He would even be interested? Excellent point.

In my opinion, He already owns at least 85% of souls if you will look on the subject from God-Satan/Heaven-Hell point of view. Why, for the love of whomever, would He go into such a business? He's got much more important things to do. They all do.

...But it's an interesting thought though...

shintashi
04-10-2009, 06:43 PM
Get a Degree in the humanities. Teach the mainstream theories of academia as if they were inspired by God. Deny the existence of any supernatural forces whatsoever, and mock anyone who tries. Preach and expound on the positive points of Kant, Malthus, and Marx, but establish yourself a solid supporter of Democracy and Capitalism. Vote for the most popular politician.

Apply for grad school at one of the top State Schools or Little Ivies. Create a thesis explaining why one Pillar of Academia was more correct than another Pillar of Academia, using no less than 15 references to other established Academics. Take a trip to Paris, and a Trip to New York City. No matter what your actual experiences, explain to every person you meet how these two places are the most wonderful, amazing, and best places on Earth.

Apply for a research student/grad position at one of the Ivy Leagues. Transfer from one Ivy to the next in your career, and ensconce yourself in the path to Administration. Finally, become an Administrator for one of these Universities and imitate their activities. By then you will have completely sold your soul.

serpent
04-11-2009, 11:14 AM
An interesting true story.

When i was 15, a friend of mine approached me at school one day with a contract he had written in his own blood and a slightly mangled finger. He told me he wrote out a contract last night, and then tried to summon Satan, but that it didn't work. And he was very dissappointed because he had written out the contract twice as he made a spelling error the first time.

My Advice.

I suggest you just start trying, call his name, make a contract before hand with your terms. Just keep trying until he appears. After all, what have you got to lose? Except your soul. Good Luck.

ninfan
04-13-2009, 09:41 PM
Don't feed the troll ;)

Wulzirik
04-15-2009, 02:43 PM
Do a barrel roll!

Best advice ever, though shintasi also has a deep understanding of it. :p Methinks Obama sold his soul a long time ago.

In all seriousness, yeah, selling your soul is a bad idea. Not only is Satan generally just not interested (he tends to not care about the games teenage mallgoth kids play), but you need a soul to work with in magick.

kimbal
04-17-2009, 02:18 AM
how do i sell my soul to satan using witchcraft????

Why sell it give it to him for free!

ocultlove47
05-27-2009, 07:41 AM
Not the soul selling bull again :((.
Look,selling your soul is not possible it's a christian bullshit,maybe you can dedicate your life to Satan or you can allie with him but you can't sell you soul.
Imagine if that would be possible how many poor ppl on earth would sell there soul.And he doest need your soul anyway,he already has it :)).

S33k3R
05-27-2009, 08:08 AM
Well...maybe he's a bit lysdexic and meant SANTA...how can I sell my soul to Santa, ...hey thats actually a really good question, I can see many benefits in being aligned with the corpulent hirsute god of the prezzies and eggnog.

serpent
05-27-2009, 11:51 AM
You can sell your soul to satan, in one sense or another. But why? I am currently offering telekinesis plus a 300 year life in exchange for human souls. Post your soul here for me and i will give you a receipt. Satan may give you a few more tricks for it but you won't get the life extension i am offering.

EDIT: For a limited time only i am also offering a free sundae with this package! Give your soul to me today! What have you got to lose?

Note: Sundae is available on astral plane only, customers must meet me on astral plane between 3 and 4 am. Customers is not entitled to a refund under any circumstances

S33k3R
05-27-2009, 12:33 PM
...dang...you really are the real thing...good thing I read the fine print, else I might have missed out on my Sundae...;)