Thread: how do i sell my soul to satan???

chronazon:
... so with no goals because all your needs would be met theoretically, you would have nothing to do but enjoy life and wait to go to hell...

So Paris Hilton DID sell her soul??? I KNEW IT!

Strider:
What makes you think that He would even be interested?

Excellent point.

In my opinion, He already owns at least 85% of souls if you will look on the subject from God-Satan/Heaven-Hell point of view. Why, for the love of whomever, would He go into such a business? He's got much more important things to do. They all do.

...But it's an interesting thought though...

Get a Degree in the humanities. Teach the mainstream theories of academia as if they were inspired by God. Deny the existence of any supernatural forces whatsoever, and mock anyone who tries. Preach and expound on the positive points of Kant, Malthus, and Marx, but establish yourself a solid supporter of Democracy and Capitalism. Vote for the most popular politician.

Apply for grad school at one of the top State Schools or Little Ivies. Create a thesis explaining why one Pillar of Academia was more correct than another Pillar of Academia, using no less than 15 references to other established Academics. Take a trip to Paris, and a Trip to New York City. No matter what your actual experiences, explain to every person you meet how these two places are the most wonderful, amazing, and best places on Earth.

Apply for a research student/grad position at one of the Ivy Leagues. Transfer from one Ivy to the next in your career, and ensconce yourself in the path to Administration. Finally, become an Administrator for one of these Universities and imitate their activities. By then you will have completely sold your soul.

An interesting true story.

When i was 15, a friend of mine approached me at school one day with a contract he had written in his own blood and a slightly mangled finger. He told me he wrote out a contract last night, and then tried to summon Satan, but that it didn't work. And he was very dissappointed because he had written out the contract twice as he made a spelling error the first time.

My Advice.

I suggest you just start trying, call his name, make a contract before hand with your terms. Just keep trying until he appears. After all, what have you got to lose? Except your soul. Good Luck.

Don't feed the troll

Originally Posted by Gazeeboh

Do a barrel roll!

Best advice ever, though shintasi also has a deep understanding of it. Methinks Obama sold his soul a long time ago.

In all seriousness, yeah, selling your soul is a bad idea. Not only is Satan generally just not interested (he tends to not care about the games teenage mallgoth kids play), but you need a soul to work with in magick.

Originally Posted by james ross collins

how do i sell my soul to satan using witchcraft????

Why sell it give it to him for free!

Not the soul selling bull again (.
Look,selling your soul is not possible it's a christian bullshit,maybe you can dedicate your life to Satan or you can allie with him but you can't sell you soul.
Imagine if that would be possible how many poor ppl on earth would sell there soul.And he doest need your soul anyway,he already has it ).

Well...maybe he's a bit lysdexic and meant SANTA...how can I sell my soul to Santa, ...hey thats actually a really good question, I can see many benefits in being aligned with the corpulent hirsute god of the prezzies and eggnog.

You can sell your soul to satan, in one sense or another. But why? I am currently offering telekinesis plus a 300 year life in exchange for human souls. Post your soul here for me and i will give you a receipt. Satan may give you a few more tricks for it but you won't get the life extension i am offering.

EDIT: For a limited time only i am also offering a free sundae with this package! Give your soul to me today! What have you got to lose?

Note: Sundae is available on astral plane only, customers must meet me on astral plane between 3 and 4 am. Customers is not entitled to a refund under any circumstances

...dang...you really are the real thing...good thing I read the fine print, else I might have missed out on my Sundae...