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Shit hit the fan
I did something bad.
I don't want to waste time with explaining in full, but I was mirror scrying with tin foil. I bent it up and crumpled it so that I could see facits of spirits. It was a good method let me tell you.
Facing north, I did this. Somehow I had an evil clown, which I emidiately burnt the tin foil in the fire. Such a vivid hate and evil I couldn't stand. I burnt him and I burnt him out.
I then continued to scry. I found a spirit and comuned with him. I don't know what these mean but I can guess their intent.
A married couple man on the left women on the right, image in the left bottom corner. a face in the upper right. it had long teeth. He then showed me a comic face that looked like ziggy. I think he (the spirit) had a beard and a square face with deep sunken eyes. He could be playing with my mind because I remember reading a comic book with a charecter of similer discription.
I then noticed that the flickering candle actualy made a sparking noise when I asked a question or said something spesific. I still don't know what any of it means.
Before any of this I had a vision of woman and a man racing in humvees, the other humvee had no discernible driver. It could have been a jeep or a hummer.
I had some visions of nuns as well. some were worn down and some where younger. I saw comidic visions of prostitutes. I saw a fat man. This isn't in order at all, but I don't have time. I'm franticly writing this because I need to get it off of my chest.
I had candles in the four corners of the world as always, but no circle to speak of. Afterwards I did a shaky and shitty LBRP and extinguished all of the candles.
I crumpled the tinfoil into a ball and burnt it to blackness with a fresh white candle, I should have said the lords prair but I didn't. I feel something lurking and evil in the box that I put it in. I need to bind it or some how do something with it. Its still here. I can feel it. Its worming into my heart like a smoke.
I did something stupid. I should have had a circle. I'm not going to lie here but im a bit scared. Im not asking for advice for what to do right now, because I know what im going to do. you can tell me what i should have done in any situation at any time but right now I have to deal with this the best way I can.
I can't tell my family becaues they would think im crazy. Agnostics all of them.
Basicly you're the only ones I can trust, and to be blunt I don't trust any of you that much at all. I'm going to copypasta this into my facebook thread with a white pagan that I have been talking to. I think I did some nasty ****. when I get a cooler head I'll delve back into this. Typng about it is actualy calming me down, and this is more of a streem oth thouht rather than anything else, im not even going to spell check this or edit it because I think it would take away form the panic. I hate this. deep breath. bull. a minutar. I see it when i close my eyes.
im going to make a seal and a circle around the box, and say some prayres nd exorsisms,. sorry for the sloppy writing.
wish me luck and i want to hear what I did wrong here just so I can get the smack in teh nuts and head like I desereve. i need to learn a lesson but its going to hurt. See you all later
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RE: Shit hit the fan
Much more calmed down. I did a better LBRP and I got some circles of mars that iad in teh comand of spirits. I showed him what for and he left, but his aura is still present. Its the stink of evil or some such melodrama. Bad mojo.
Phew, sorry for the freak out. I was really alarmed at how powerful that aura was. It was like a snake and smoke and hate all mixed into one. I hate coining in evil, so I'll say a tricky spirit instead.
Here's how I scryed so you know.
I washed and put on some comfortable clothes, as always.
I put candles in the four corners of the world.
I cut and bent my tinfoil so that there were no holes. I then cut the tinfoil in half, and crumpled up one even more, so as to add more detail. I used the big one for a while, and encountered that clown. It was a clown but I don't think that was what it was truly... I think it was jjust playing off of a fear.
The others are important, but less so. The tricky one was what really freaked me out.
Everything was dark except for the candles
The northern one flickered and sparked and made that spark noise when I asked a question or was spesific in asking a question. I hooked one in, thats for sure.
What I didn't do was add a circle for my protection. That was a mistake. He may be inside me, or his aura, because I can still feel his stink. I have bad deja vu right now.
Though I have done a lot of reading I have not put to much practice in. This entire experiance reminds me of how much a novice I am. What I need is a good mentor or someone I can talk to. **** I did this wrong.
This makes me feel stupid and very naive compared to all of you. I haven't been practicing the occult for 5 months and you all have been for years. I apologize. This makes me look stupid and like an armchair magician. I read and read and read but rarely do I ever DO ...Practically every single other work of magick I have done before this has been relatively smooth. Bumps due to inexperience but none the less smooth.
*sighlife*
My soul feels tired.
Im sorry for the rants guys.
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RE: Shit hit the fan
I am going to yell at you. No matter how long we have been practicing we still have mishaps from time to time. I could write a book on all the screw ups and if someone tells you different they are lying. It is the fact that you are strong enough to admit this that will help you on your way to be an excellent magickian. Rant all you want. We are all here to learn.
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RE: Shit hit the fan
well I certainly hope that you weren't standing in front of the fan when the " it Hit " I make myself laugh !!
hey come on we all make mistakes and they are called learning experiences and that's why we are all here to learn and help one another with the journey we have chosen to take
Some are well versed in different aspects of Magick like with all aspects of Magick we must remember and always start with the basics with the basics and that is first protection and second Banishing at least in my eyes
I know Redhand will correct me or and to this
My first **** hitting the fan experience involved candles and ended up with the fire department be called to put the room out
Redhand you can stop laughing now !!!
and for the rest of all the Magicians feel free to add your " **** Hitting the fan experience's the rest of you aren't perfect and that is not the only screw up I had !!
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RE: Shit hit the fan
*sighface*
Yeah... Thanks for the encouragement guys. It scared me because I wasn't in control. The spirit or whatever it was popped out of the mirror and started to mess with me. It soiled my house and today, every one in here is either in a bad mood or some other such aspect of negativity.
My family has a strict no candles rule. They discovered my circle and messed about with my stuff. Then my dad called me a wiccan, which for some reason bugged me. I really really didn't like that. Not because I hold a disrespect for wiccans, but because he just lumped me in without understanding what I was doing. I offered to answer any questions he had but he proceeded to call me a ****, and what I was doing is ****.
REALLY can't wait until I get a place of my own... lol just for the purpose of burning candles!
Anyway, I learned from this. On the positive side, it worked! I communed with a spirit... even though it was trying to make me kill myself :P Lesson learned.
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RE: Shit hit the fan
dont let your dad get you down he will come around sooner or later... my parents were the same way until i toled them that i was not going to change for them and they started to except me and my magick....
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RE: Shit hit the fan
Its not so much the magick as is the candles. But he is resentful and thinks I'm an idiot ext ext. I'm not so worried about my self esteem as I am seeking behind his back and getting caught.
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RE: Shit hit the fan
YEHA I KNOW HOW THAT IS MY DAD WAS THE SAME WAY LOL :)
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RE: Shit hit the fan
:D bonding via candle restrictions! Hahaha this post made my mood rise quite a bit.
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RE: Shit hit the fan
Calling Entities with Unclear Spheres of Origin can bring rather unexpected results.
Besides having the LBRP mastered a clear intent on the entity you want to evoke should be made clear before the actual work begins. There are several safer methods than these older one found in these grimiores. I use a Tarot deck which in a way has it's protection built in, it begins by performing the Opening the Key Spread in which all of these entities come forward and in some ways they seem to compete to perform task or to answer questions. This is not as easy as it seems but, not only is it safer you are not browbeating them as so many of the old text suggest.