How Kabbalah Is Used To Decode Our Own Life?

How Kabbalah Is Used To Decode Our Own Life?
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HI i been studying a little of Kabbalah, tarot and astrology, are very interesting disciplines.

but something shoking happens to me every time I try to nalize with gematria some aspects of my life.

for example my date of birth.

september 3rd 1981 at 12 15 am

so my birth date is

3 6 9 12 15 a secuence of 3

3rd day
6th zodiac sign virgo
9th month september
12 hour
15 minutes

81 9*9 3*3*3*3

when I try to explain this with aspects such as

BINAH
VAV
6TH creation DAY
YESOD
THE HANGED MAN
etc, I get so confuse when the answer to the code is THE HOLY GHOST, or the MOON CHILD,or ANDROMEDA ETC.

I Know for sure that I´m not a demigod or such, I´m a very unperfected man with not comparision even to the mighty CAMEL.

but how can I use this archetipes in my life? what is their real MEANING.

is there someone that knows someone who can help me understand?, or an online site to accomplish this task?.

My question is not to confirm a fact that I already know is absurd, I´m not proclaiming anything.

my question is to find guidance, to be able to study kabbalah, and use it without confusion of the arquetipes.

my question is to find how the symbol of the holy ghost can be used in our own life.

hOw can I use the MACROCOSMOS understanding with my MICROCOSMOS human being.

as above so below, but when the holy ghost comes to below, transforms into what?

MIND?
SPIRIT?
REASON?
GOOD WILL?
COMPASSION?

MY HEART
MY HEAD

where in my human being is that CAMEL??? in LIBER 3 where is declared by Crowley, that the horse is action and that the horse fears the teeth of the camel, if my birth date is influenced by 3, does this mean that my actions are already bitten, o that I bite the actions of others, I don’t know and this is so confusing for me.

thanks for Reading

I see it as you on a journey that will take sacrifice to get through some stops on the path, trust thy spirit and you will come through.

Crowley also stated that the symbology of the Camel is supposed to represent the Adept crossing the Abyss in order to become a Master of the Temple.

It could be that you were born to cross it, instead of being Chosen by Babalon as many happen to be.

A moon child is supposed to be an astral spirit that is created through sex-magick. Generally, they are used by an adept in order to be a sort of ''guardian angel'' because they reflect the Higher Self, its' nature and Will. They are also the closest to human consciousness that a human can create. They serve you. However, it is dangerous to create one because too much masculine energy makes it vampyric and it will ultimately destroy the magician and starve. Thus it is called a Moon Child because it is more Yin than Yang. Crowley sought to make the Moon Child incarnate, though. By doing this, the moon child was assimilated with the spirit that incarnated in that child. It made the child have a very powerful Will and it also happened to make the child ''grow into'' enlightenment.

In my highest opinion, the child's sub-conscious was a mirror of their Higher Self. The Higher Self being one's ''Holy Guardian Angel''.

You may be a moon child.

If you want to take this a step farther, this also makes sense with The Holy Spirit. The Holy Spirit is supposed to be the part of the God-Head that descends upon the believer in Christ (given to us by Christ and his sacrifice) so that we may be drawn closer to God. God = Universal Conscious/Nuit.

Alekthor,
What is your final reduction you arrive at with your gematria calculation ?

I would use, for your times of birth;
3+6+9+12+15 = 45, then add the 4 & 5 from 45 thus making your actual birth number = 9.

What list of numeric values are you working from, if I may ask ?

Best wishes,
Ahrazura

Alekthor,
It is almost a month since you fielded your initial question. I would have thought that something as important to you would have driven you to pursue you inquiry a little harder that that which has become evident here.
I have a working knowledge of gematria and would have helped you work out the meanings of numerics pertinent to yourself. What you must ask yourself is do you want possible answers enough to actually interact in threads that you yourself start ?

Ahrazura