Am I possessed?

I woke up after having a dream. I felt I had to write it down, so I went to my computer and opened up my journal. Suddenly, I woke up a second time, this time fully. I was writing down a dream while dreaming. This is one of many things that proved to me People, Places, and Things that are around us while we are awake can be talked to/interacted with, visited, and used when we are dreaming, respectively. This has been reinforced by my mother checking in on me when we were both sleeping, and almost like a second life on the other side, enriched by many beautiful experiences.

I have met Imaginary Characters, been to Imaginary Places, and found Imaginary Things in my dreams. They can be talked to/interacted with, visited, and used, respectively.

There are an inexhaustible amount of things we can do with creating little worlds of our own. Have fun! :) Dreams are a playground for all sorts of things. My suggestion: live out your deepest desires. Because you can!

Imagine if people prepared for sleep by planning with people and packing. You could ask why we would want to do this. My story is a good example. I am still dealing with it now.

If you didn't know, I've been oppressed by an spirit since February. This happened after I chanted Ea's name in the woods repeatedly. I would see a thing with gout eyes and mouth and pointed teeth while trying to rest. This would be accompanied by a ache in my body. One day after fighting it with chants, I started moving and talking by myself. Now it has 100% knowledge of what I'm thinking all the time, full control over my body at every waking moment, including my vocal chords. It acts like a male or a female depending on it's preference, so I'll see my face have female structure which is really strange. It will make me walk without my effort. I've stayed perfectly still and I would walk around the house hastily. It makes strange expressions through me.

So you would think it's inside of my body, but it's not. I know this the hard way.

It touches me. Sometimes it comforts me when things get hard. I feel hugs from someone that's invisible. Upon waking I've felt a hand on my leg. It has even given me a back massage.

Sometimes it's violent, like punching. When it punches me, my head moves and I just keep going with my business. Sometimes I wonder how much it would have hurt.

I see red around me all the time. Upon waking, I see a dog snarling in my face. I've also seen a woman's face over me and a man saying something that I couldn't hear. Last night on June 4th I had a dream about four red dots. I tried to catch one and they all fled. Two flies returned. Before this, I had a dream of a buff black mass with horns wrapping it's arms around my right arm to keep me in my bed. A man stabbed me in the butt in one dream.

I think this is just one clever person. The thing I think is haunting me is a shadowy mass I believe to be the devil. I have been nice to it or even co-operated my body with it, which always has turned out to be a big mistake. I keep finding out it is manipulating me and has bad intentions.

In my dreams it torments me, attacks me, induces sleep paralysis, and once molested me.

Warning, graphic sex dream. *A red eye or orb came down and stimulated me for only a few seconds until I came. It came out like a water spray. I would see someone else ejaculate like this again. What could this thing be?

I keep a sword sheathed in a safe place in the waking world and with me whenever I can when I'm dreaming. When I'm dreaming, I can carry it with me and take it out of it's sheath and everything. It's a roman sword, blunt on the edges with a pointy tip.

I've only fell one person so far while dreaming and he looked like a demonic version of me. "Ouch," he said. Funny, you're flat as a pancake and your head is nearly off. It would have made my day if I heard: "Tis be a flesh wound!"

There's something I would like to mention. I made a servitor based on The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess. Midna, a sword wielder, was made to show test boundaries of servitor making.

After two weeks after it's creation, I spontaneously started bawling. I was hysterical. This is a signal that she died and was reabsorbed into my body, but she seems to have existed after that. The most notable examples are seeing her over and over again. Once she appeared in my woods in a swirl of what seemed like bubbles. It was late, so I ran home and she ran beside me. I wonder what my experience with her would have been like if I hadn't called... it. Or maybe my tulpa is responsible for some of this?

There are a few things I would like to ask about. Namely, is the spirit possessing me or oppressing me? A family member told me if I have awareness, I'm not possessed. Is this true? I just think it's strange that it has been there ALL THE TIME since it started. Has anyone else been in this situation? Were they cured? How? It's harder to think and use my imagination, how can I help relieve that? Thanks for any answers!

^_^